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Bulimia and panic attacks

by Mal, 17

I’m a very average girl. I hang out with all the pretty people, I get compliments all the time, I have a football player boyfriend, my parents spoil me beyond belief, I go to all the parties and everyone knows my name.

The only thing they don’t know is that I’m bulimic and I have very often panic attacks. I panic so much most of the time I can barely breathe. It has gotten worse. Since sometime in November of 2008 I have not gone a day without throwing up.

Freak out

I have panic attacks all the time. I also have autophobia, which is the fear of being alone and that is what started all of my problems. I freak out other times then when I’m alone but it is so much worse when I am.

I also freak out way too much over my body image, by trying to stay in the cool crowds at school. I am recently discovering that I need help and I’m very scared.

Be yourself

I just wanted to let people know that just because all the ‘normal’ people look normal and act ‘normal’ doesn't mean that they are; they struggle with things just like every one else in this world.

And I want people to know that they should always just be themselves because when you freak out like I do it just makes things worse. Things shouldn’t have to be like this and there is someone in this world who does care about your feelings.

And I just wanted say good luck to everyone in their journey to overcome any of their problems. Just stay positive :)

This story may have been edited by Children First for Health for editorial and confidentiality reasons only.

infoFor more information contact

  • Visit Anorexia & Bulimia Care or call their helpline on 01934 710 336
  • The charity beat (formerly the Eating Disorders Association) have loads of resources. You can call the adult Helpline on 0845 634 1414 or the Youth Helpline on 0845 634 7650
  • YoungMinds provides information and advice on child mental health issues. You can ring on 0800 018 2138

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