Sexual abuse | Teenage Health | Teens First for Health

What is sexual abuse?

ChildLine defines sexual abuse as: “When children are forced or persuaded into sexual acts or situations by others. Children might be encouraged to look at pornography, be harassed by sexual suggestions or comments, be touched sexually or forced to have sex.”

If you know or think this is happening to you now it’s important you tell someone about it as soon as possible. Call ChildLine on 0800 11 11 (24hrs).

How common is sexual abuse?

Most recent estimates in Britain suggest at least ten per cent of children suffer sexual abuse at some time, with two thirds of the victims being girls. In over 90 per cent of the cases the person committing the abuse (the abuser) is male. Sometimes the abuser can even be a young person close in age to the victim.

How does sexual abuse happen?

Sexual abuse happens when one person uses the power they have over another person to take advantage of them sexually. These people are usually in a position of trust or influence. For example, they may be older or stronger.

Sexual abuse can happen just once or it can happen regularly. The abuse can involve inappropriate touching or actual sexual penetration. The person who abuses may be a relative, someone you know or a complete stranger. When committing the abuse they may pretend that the touching is a game, or it might be more aggressive in the form of an assault.

At the time the abuse is often scary and traumatic but later on, powerful feelings can arise when you look back and understand fully what’s happened.

What are the effects of sexual abuse?

People who have suffered from sexual abuse can often have a lot of negative emotions to cope with. These include anger, anxiety, sadness, isolation, and fear. There can also be frustration because other people don’t seem to understand.

Sometimes, mental health problems like eating disorders, panic attacks, anxiety, depression and bi-polar disorder can have their roots in sexual abuse. You may also be more likely to self-harm or experience suicidal feelings. Remember that these things are triggered by other factors too – and it doesn’t mean someone has been abused if they have one of these conditions.

If you have been abused it’s important to get help with your feelings so that you can avoid any health problems in the future.

People don’t always show problems from the abuse straight away. But, if you don’t seek help, you may find the feelings overwhelm you at some point and may turn into a mental health problem.

Getting help

If you have been abused – or fear you have – it can be very hard to take the first step in seeking help.

It can be doubly hard if you’ve already tried to tell someone and they didn’t respond well – either they didn’t believe you, or they were embarrassed or didn’t know what to say (or said something insensitive).

Sometimes even professionals can be clumsy and you can end up feeling even more alone and isolated. This should not put you off speaking up again – even though it’s understandable if you don’t want to or are nervous about it.

It’s helpful to know that more and more people are clued up to the fact that child abuse happens and that there are lots of people who suffer today as a result of past abuse.

There are also organisations and many trained professionals in this area who are used to dealing with people who have been abused in all sorts of ways.

Sexual abuse is a criminal offence but it is not always prosecuted because of a lack of evidence and because it can be hard to 'prove'. That is why it is important to tell someone as soon as you can.

What is the treatment if you have been sexually abused?

The first step is finding someone you can talk to. This needs to be someone you can trust and someone who you can speak freely to in confidence.

If you approach an organisation which specialises in dealing with victims of sexual abuse, they will understand and be used to dealing with the things you have to talk about.

Nothing you can say to them will shock them. Speaking to someone can help you decide what you want to do next.

This might be having some sort of therapy or counselling or finding a group of people you can meet with who have been through the same thing as you.

There are lots of support services listed below which can point you in the right direction for help. Some of them are only open part-time so don’t be discouraged if you they don’t make contact immediately after you call or leave a message.

You can also find websites and books that will help put you in touch with people or help you find ways of dealing with the abuse.

Looking forward

You may well feel sometimes that you have been irreversibly damaged by what’s happened to you. Sometimes people come to believe that they can never have healthy relationships with other people and that they will never recover.

However, it’s really important to remember that human beings are pretty resilient and have an amazing capacity for recovery.

It’s true that you can’t wipe out what happened in the past. But with time, and by looking after yourself, it’s possible to get to a place where you function and feel as healthy as any other person.

For more help and information

ChildLine offers 24 hour confidential support. Call 0800 11 11.

Childwatch work for the good of children and adults who have been abused.

NCH Action for Children helps vulnerable young people achieve their potential.

YoungMinds are committed to improving the mental health of all children and young people. You can download a leaflet on sexual abuse from their website.

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Last reviewed by Great Ormond Street Hospital and the Centre for Social Work, University of Nottingham: 24 June 2008

Mental health > Ssssh specialist topics > Sexual abuse